Why can it be so hard to be kind to ourselves? If you find self-compassion difficult, you are not alone. Research has shown that sometimes even when we try to be compassionate to ourselves, we can feel worse, a phenomenon scholars call "backdraft" (The Greater Good Science Center). However, this month is all about SELF-DISCOVERY. When certain ways of practicing SELF-COMPASSION just aren't working, we have the opportunity to learn more about ourselves and seek out alternative strategies.
For example, if saying kind words to yourself isn't providing you the reassurance you need, the Greater Good Science Center suggests finding JOY through "behavioral self-compassion." This can mean going for a short walk, listening to music, or taking a quick snack break. As you seek different soothing activities, you may also IDENTIFY YOUR STRENGTHS. Which activities motivate you the most? What draws you to them?
By practicing self-compassion, finding joy, and identifying our strengths, we can discover more tools that can help us get through our daily lives. What opportunities do you have today for self-discovery?
3 TOOLS FOR SELF-DISCOVERY
1) Be Compassionate Toward Yourself. While this can feel easier said than done, remember that there are MANY ways to be compassionate toward yourself. Check out this toolkit from To Write Love On Her Arms for some suggestions!
2) Look for Joy in Your Life. Acknowledging joy in your life does not mean ignoring pain or sadness. Rather, finding joy can mean recognizing the small and big things that boost your soul and encourage you to keep going even during challenging times.
3) Identify Your Strengths. We all have strengths that motivate us and help us through difficult dilemmas, but identifying them can be tricky. Sometimes just starting with the activities you enjoy or what others have complimented you on can be a good start.
Check out our entire February 2025 newsletter focused on Self-Discovery here.
