Regulating Emotions — Blog — Courage to Caregivers

MARCH 2024 NEWSLETTER: Living Mindfully - Presence is the best present 💝

As a caregiver, do you feel you're mindful (living in the present moment) or is your mind full (overwhelmed, scattered, trying to do too much, or multi-tasking)?

For me, I find myself constantly teetering between BOTH, but if I'm being honest, I most often find my mind FULL. But 2023 my intention was to be more present - for myself and others. I made a concerted effort in my goal setting to focus on the here and now. 2023 quickly became one of my most challenging caregiving years. Caring for aging parents (and bonus parents), as well as a young adult with a traumatic brain injury, is hard on a good day - and we had many road blocks with detours in 2023. I lost sight of ME and felt pulled in too many directions.

Mindfulness is the ability to focus on the present moment while calmly recognizing and accepting your thoughts, feelings, and body sensations. Mindfulness is being fully present, aware of where you are and what you’re doing while not being overly reactive or overwhelmed by what is happening around you. When you are mindful you are free of both the past and future and free of judgment of right and wrong. Mindfulness for caregivers means learning to live in the moment, accepting the reality of your situation, and filtering out distractions.

Check out our entire March Newsletter focused on MINDFULNESS here!

The Fleeting Nature of Emotions

“You feel angry? … You feel great? … This too shall pass.” – Tom Hanks

You probably know that we’re all about empowerment at Courage to Caregivers. And one of the best ways we can empower ourselves is by truly understanding our feelings and emotions – what we feel, why we feel that way, and how to keep our emotions from gaining control over us.

By learning to regulate our emotions, we are able to get back to our emotional center. This doesn’t mean we should try to suppress our feelings or pretend they don’t exist. We’re talking about recognizing our emotions for what they are – natural, instinctive responses that are neither good nor bad in and of themselves. It’s how we act after feeling those emotions that makes all the difference.

MindfulnessKristi HornerMarch 7, 2024Regulating Emotions, Emotions, 90-Second Rule

March Newsletter: Mindfulness - Presence is the best present 🎁

Mindfulness may feel "trendy" or just an "overused" term to you. Before we launched Courage to Caregivers in 2018 - it did to me, too! As I have come to understand, appreciate, and aspire to make mindfulness a practice in my daily life, mindfulness has become my #1 coping strategy for the stress of caregiving.

I face stress as a caregiver each and every day. I support a young adult with a traumatic brain injury and aging parents (one newly minted 90-year old) - both living in our home. Using mindfulness as a coping strategy for the stress of caregiving, I am able to better regulate my emotions, sleep better (and return to sleep more effectively), notice when I'm not focused on what's IN my control, and find myself simply more present. I also love that mindfulness is rooted in COMPASSION - and we're all born with the capacity to be mindful.

I now find myself focusing on my breath (it truly can be that simple - and our breathing meditation classes have shown me just that), using affirmations and intentions and focusing on the present.

Mindful Magazine (our go-to for all things MINDFUL) has an excellent definition of mindfulness: "Mindfulness is the basic human ability to be fully present, aware of where we are and what we’re doing, and not overly reactive or overwhelmed by what’s going on around us. Mindfulness is a quality that every human being already possesses, it’s not something you have to conjure up, you just have to learn how to access it."

Check out our entire March newsletter focused on Mindfulness here.

The Wave of Emotions

One of our favorite visualization techniques is to think of emotions like waves in the ocean. They’re always coming and going … they’re neither good nor bad … and they don’t last long. Some emotions may make us feel uncomfortable, but if we view them like waves, it can be easier to let go of them. Watch them go away like the waves going back out to sea.

Inhale … exhale … let go.

Now you have freed up space in your mind and heart that you can fill with positive and helpful feelings such as happiness, contentment, hope, and excitement.

That little exercise is one way of regulating emotions.

MindfulnessKristi HornerMarch 2, 2023Emotions, Emotional Self-Control, Regulating Emotions