Bridges of Love and Empathy
“Love builds bridges where there are none.” – R.H. Delaney
There’s a reason we use the term “loved ones” in our mission statement: “To provide hope, support, and courage to caregivers and loved ones of those living with mental illness.” With all the complications and struggles involved in caregiving, we recognize that love is what drives all that we do.
With LOVE … we can look at our loved ones with compassion and kindness; we can find the strength to see their perspective; we can do hard things; and we can find hope. And when we can approach any challenging encounter with love, we have a better chance of building a bridge that narrows the gap between our differences.
Empathy also plays a large role in building bridges. When we feel and express empathy for others, it allows us to connect to their emotions, recognize their strengths, and support their potential. As caregivers, we’re no strangers to empathy, which should not be confused with sympathy. Brené Brown likens sympathy to seeing someone in a deep hole and talking to them from above, while empathy is getting down in the hole with the other person, being vulnerable together, and making sincere connections.
Love and empathy allow us to see each other as individuals, with unique thoughts, beliefs, and experiences that inform our worldview. Instead of viewing our differences in terms of “I’m right and you’re wrong,” we see them as opportunities to build connections and expand our understanding by learning about other people.
Here are five tools for building strong bridges:
Assume good intentions when you set expectations. Your mindset is everything. As you approach a difficult interaction … pause, notice your thoughts, and recognize your assumptions of the other person.
Practice mindfulness. Take a breath. Be patient. Listen. Take another breath.
Be flexible. Keep an open mind. Expand your view. Get out of your comfort zone.
Practice empathy. Listen with compassion and positivity. Let your body language show that you are engaged. Take turns.
Remember that it’s a journey. Cultivating a practice of building bridges takes time. It takes two people for every interaction.
And one more thing … remember that YOU are in control of YOU. Be gentle with yourself, and with others, as you build and cross over those bridges.