Coping – The Seventh “C”
As we close out this month’s theme of “attitude,” our discussion this week focuses on coping mechanisms. In stressful situations, people turn to all kinds of things to help them cope. Some of these coping mechanisms are healthy, and some are not.
Healthy coping behaviors can include lowering expectations, asking for help, using problem-solving skills, taking responsibility, talking to supportive people, expressing your emotions, trying to change the source of the stress, distancing yourself from the stress, and exploring a religious perspective on the problem. Unhealthy coping behaviors can include abusing alcohol or drugs, compulsive or disordered eating, self-harm (such as cutting), and obsessive behaviors such as gambling, being a workaholic, or being addicted to your computer or phone.
By adopting healthy coping mechanisms, we can get through stressful situations faster and with less negative impact on our physical and emotional health. Healthy coping skills come in many varieties, but what matters most is what works for you. As noted in this article from VeryWell Mind, coping skills can be either problem-based, which can help you change a stressful situation, or emotion-based, which can help you cope with stress by taking care of your feelings in a healthy way. Either type can be helpful, depending on the situation.
One of my favorite healthy ways of coping is to BREATHE. The key for me has been learning how to breathe the right way and incorporating a habit of meditation into my daily life. I didn’t believe it would work until I tried it and saw how breathing the right way really did change my relationship with stress. If you haven’t tried our weekly breathing meditation program, I encourage you to do so. Our fabulous breathing meditation leaders coach you on how to reclaim your breath, make brain-body connections, and build healthy habits for coping with stress.
Another healthy way to cope is to find a community of support, which could include your family, friends, neighbors, or colleagues. By leaning on your support system in combination with your internal strength and determination, you can manage the stress of caregiving and survive the challenges of life.
At Courage to Caregivers, we want to be a valuable member of your support team, too. That’s why we often refer to what we call the 7 C’s – “I didn't CAUSE it. I can't CURE it. I can't CONTROL it. I can't CHANGE it. Yet, I can have COURAGE and COMPASSION, and I can COPE!” These 7 C’s, an extension of the 3 C’s of Recovery, speak so well about the support we want to provide to caregivers – and to YOU – to help you cope.